James Ellroy is one seriously creepy dude. Watching Murder By The Book and he's on there taking about his mother's murder (and repeating about a million times how he lusted for her and hated her and wanted her dead) and opening the box of murder evidence and SNIFFING HER DRESS.

Yes, the one she died in.

Earlier in the program he's talking about how he used to break into women's houses to see their bedrooms and peep into windows and such.

I mean yes I understand his mother's murder and then being raised by his sleezeball dad warped his brains a little but HOLY CREEPY DUDE.

This is the Live Journal book that I contributed to. Pay was 25 dollar LJ gift certificate , plus 50 dollar Blurb gift certificate to purchase a contributor's copy of the book in whatever format I wanted. I chose the super deluxe hardcover version - which meant I wound up having to pay $1.94 in shipping, but hey. My contribution is a journal entry I did involving an incident that took place in our neighborhood.

Says it will ship on October 8th, so will let you know when it arrives how the book is.

Random trivia: This is my second book contribution - the first being a blurb that appears in a book called It's Never Too Late To Become A Buffy Fan by Kiss Me Jane Productions.

Please don't buy this man's books.

I have never read anything by John C. Wright, nor do I intend to. But in case you do, you might want to think twice about giving a homophobic asshole your money.

Apparently Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett died today. Both were pretty much iconic figures - I remember having Charlie's Angels dolls as a kid, and in the 80s when the Thriller music video was a sensational hit having a Michael Jackson style jacket. Farrah had cancer and died after a long struggle - she made a documentary about it that was supposedly very moving (I haven't seen it). Michael Jackson... well. What can you say about the freakish turn of his life that hasn't already been said? I still don't understand why everyone gets so emotional about the death of celebrities. Three radio stations on the way home were playing Michael Jackson songs, and earlier the Beatles break on another local station was dedicated in part to Farrah. What did Farrah have to do with the Beatles? Nothing, but she died today and they had a show so good enough. What a circus.

I have spent the past couple of days helping my brother, who needed to go to the hospital with bad shoulder and neck pain. They were worried he might be having a heart attack and ran all sorts of tests. Turns out he has bursitis, and he's doing okay today thanks to the magic healing powers of steroids and percoset. The hospital formerly known as Kessler (now Atlanti Care) is at least cleaner then Kessler was and has some new furnishings. They've taken away the depressing beg for money while you are forced to see repetitive stories of children dying horribly while you wait St. Jude commercial tv, which is definitely a bonus. The wait time however, is atrocious. It was bad enough at Kessler, but Atlanti Care suffered from a distinct lack of beds and staff. There was one doctor on duty, and maybe six beds in the emergency room that I could see? People were waiting for upwards of three hours just to get in. The doctor on call was very competent and nice when we did finally get in there though. But the sheer amount of suffering going on, with people moaning and children screaming, was horrific. I felt like I was at a field hospital, surrounded by the broken and bleeding and dying. It was really not a happy night.

With me I had Joe Jackson's book, a A Cure For Gravity. If you do not know who Joe Jackson is (hint: not Michael's father), remedy this fact immediately and have a listen to his newest album Rain. The book is his autobiography (the first twenty-five years or so anyhow) and a witty discourse on the nature of music and our relationship with it. Great book, great musician. Gave me something to think about when I definitely needed that.

Expensive week here at the Cushing house - have to pay the balance of the shed on Monday, and just bought a Roomba for mom for mother's day. Also my grill died - so I wound up getting a super George Forman grill thingy with timer and removable plates and adjustable broiler etc. because we use it so often (grilled meat for the win!) that it's really worth paying a bit extra for the features. Still, spending over 2000 dollah in the space of about seven days is a little intimidating, even when you do actually have the money saved for it and it is (with the exception of the grill which died suddenly) all planned for.

Oddly enough, my old laptop sort of resurrected itself (idk either - zombie electronics ftw?) and my new laptop is having some Vista-related dysfunction. So we've gone from one completely functional laptop to two semi-functional ones. So it goes.

I have not yet started reading Geek Love, as I was intending to finish up Widow of the South first - then got re-distracted by some of my German books (which are non-fiction accounts of various WWII topics that I can only read a bit at a time because they're heavy subject matter). So... eventually I will start reading that.

The circus is coming to town - there's Ringling Brothers in Philly at the spectrum and Cole brothers right in Vineland as far as smaller shows go. Both are show dates within the next couple of weeks, so if I want to go to one or both I would have to figure it out soon. Major problems with the one in philly - driving and parking. Major problems with the one in Vineland - probably bad bleacher seating that'll pretty much kill my back. So... worth it, not worth it? I love the circus, and have a character driven interest to see a show up close and personal to boot - but it may be too much trouble logistically speaking.

Speaking of shows, have not heard back from Adam regarding guest listing for B52's / The 88 on Saturday. I may have waited too long to drop him the reminder email - or maybe he'll still get back to me. We shall see. I just hate not knowing until the last minute what to plan for.

The illustrious mister Nathan sent me Rolling Stone's 500 Greatest Albums of all time (book) so I am going to make it my new project to listen to all five hundred albums and give my opinions of them. Am considering doing this as a separate blog, vs just putting them here, vs making a community for them. Might also find the albums and host them somewhere for DLs, or link to them streaming from imeem so other people can listen and give their opinions too. Thoughts? Anyone interested in playing along if I make it a separate community?

The lilacs are blooming, which always puts me in mind of the Walt Whitman poem. I performed that and O Captain, My Captain once for high school forensics (public speaking sort of deal - not to be confused with the dead people kind) and I have been fond of them since. Other signs of spring - a herd of eight deer spotted by the side of the road, the birds flying in pairs, all sorts of insects and animals starting to run about again.

I went for a bike ride with my brother today, and would like to go walking this weekend if the weather and time permit.

I am just about to start reading Geek Love which Ash and Jess both said was really good. I am also going to start in on some comics as recommended by Dien, but I do not know where to start as yet. Too many choices!

I am feeling a little unwell today, though likely from allergies. There is swine flu reported in the next county over, but I'm not going to get paranoid over it. Aus made dinner for us tonight - he's such a good husband.

Our shed should be here in about a week- then it will be time to get the book business going again. It is also almost time to put the houseplants out on the deck for the growing season.

Meme time:

(stolen from Jeffie - which I totally pronounce as Hef-ay sometimes in my head just because I can)
1. Tell you why I friended you.
2. Associate you with something - fandom, a song, a color, a photo, a word etc.
3. Tell you something I like about you.
4. Tell you a memory I have of you.
5. Ask something I've always wanted to know about you.
6. Tell you my favorite user pic of yours.
7. In return, you must post this in your Lj.

Stopped by Goodwill today and picked up some interesting books - primarily WWII/ Holocaust stuff, but also some other things. I might write the list down later when I get home if I feel like it, but I am not so inclined at the moment as I am about to run and eat dinner before going to the history society meeting. The speaker this month is something about vineyards and local farming that I may or may not find interesting. I am more interested in seeing if my brother remembers the pledge of allegiance because he keeps effing it up and it's funny. Now that he's the society president, he has to get up there and lead us. And I tell you, he is leading us into DISASTER! Not that I say the pledge - I have pledged not to say the pledge until my country is again a place I can be proud of, which I do not see occuring for some time yet. Perhaps it is on the way.

I am still ill with this sinus malady, but I am managing.

I may perhaps be in the LJ anthology book - they sent me a kind note about it a while ago, and I gave them my five favorite entries. Found out yesterday they chose one as a finalist - it will either be in the book itself, or receive an 'honorable mention'. I do not know which yet, but I think that is rather nice. Speaking of journal, I have to decorate this one for spring soon.

Man, I need to take a break I think from some of the reading and research I've been doing and read something light-hearted for a while tomorrow. Reading personal accounts of living in Nazi Germany is just overwhelming sometimes - it always shocks me, the depths of cruelty that human beings are capable of towards each other. When I embarked on this whole project, I had a vague understanding of what had occurred of course - perhaps more than most people who don't really ever look into these things has. But when you start reading personal accounts and getting into trying to understand the mentality that allowed such madness to happen - it's just overwhelming at times. Still, I think that more of us need to read and understand these sort of things - as uncomfortable as they are, we need to teach more of this in schools so that children will grow up into adults that will not allow these things to happen again.

I think to some extent that I am also suffering my yearly holiday depression. I have tried to stave this off by getting in the spirit - sending out cards and presents, finishing my shopping early and so forth. For a while it worked, but it's starting to fade now that there's nothing left to do leaving behind that whole melancholy that seems to strike around this time. I have traced this before - I understand that it likely stems from the year my father was dying (from november thru to march) - that difficult last holiday season with him where he was cantankerous and things were unpleasant no matter how hard we tried to make them otherwise. I think that was pretty much the end of it for me and holiday enjoyment, at least for a while. I'm trying to pick it back up, but it's just a lot of forcing myself to do things until something clicks for a little while and makes me enjoy it just a bit.

I did manage to finally get a Soundtracking column up, which is good. I want to try and get back into the habit of writing my music column again. No progress on the comic script, partially because I feel really pressured to finish it, which in turn makes me really avoidant of it as a source of stress.

Mom and Ron took me to the bookstore today to buy me books for Christmas. Also had lunch at Olive Garden - yum!

These are the books I got:

Scheisse! The Real German You Were Never Taught In School

German for Dummies

The Theory and Practice of Hell: The German Concentration Camps and the Systems Behind Them

What We Knew: Terror, Mass Murder, and Everyday Life In Nazi Germany

Weimar Germany: Promise and Tragedy

Finally finished the Christian historical romance... man, so very bad. So very, very bad. The author has a website - http://lindaford.org/ and on it, she gives advice on how to write. If it will make your writing like hers? DO NOT FOLLOW.

One down, one to go. So far this one doesn't open with anyone praying - just a character Faith and her sister Charity (sigh) and a tornado. No wait, four pages in- there's the praying.

"Oh, dear God." Her prayer was as plaintive, as wistful as the wind that carried it. "Please, please show me what to do. Spare me this obligation."

No, God will not spare you from this obligation - any more than He will come down and spare me from having to read this crappy book.

Yesterday I learned going through self-scan at the grocery store with a bunch of food is a bad idea - my back did not appreciate it.

Tomorrow - Thanksgiving, a quiet one with good food, let us hope.

1. For more writers and roleplayers to join my writing prompt community, charloft . And participate!

2. A cheap/free/affordable used laptop - only needs to get the internet and play games - for my 79 year old mom. I've been showing her computer stuff and I'd like her to have her own computer to use whenever she likes.

3. Postcards from around the country/world for my postcard collection.

4. Coins from around the world for my coin collection.

5. Christmas cards! I like getting cards.

6. Someone to draw a picture of one of my characters for me, or someone to write me a story involving one of my characters.

7. Crochet supplies (yarn, easy patterns, books on how-to ). I'm still a crochet newbie, but I really like it.

8. A funny or cute Christmas icon for my LJ.

9. WWII history books - European (Germany and/or Occupied France) preferred. Personal accounts more than this-or-that-battle (I have plenty of those already!), especially involving Germany, Holocaust studies, homosexuality in Nazi Germany.

I am particularly looking for The Pink Triangle, The Men in the Pink Triangle, and An Underground Life Got these! Thanks!

10. Paragraph 175 and Bent , any other movies along this line. Got these! Thanks!

11. Books / CDs / other materials on learning the German language.

12. Mix CDs / mp3s. Some bands I like: The Decemberists, Owen, Ozma, Rilo Kiley, The Elected, Bright Eyes, Neva Dinova, The Bravery, The Magnetic Fields - to give you an idea of my tastes.

My mailing address:

Laura Cushing
po box 141
Newtonville, NJ 08346-0141

This cold is kicking my ass. I'm congested from my sinuses to my chest. Today just going out to run some errands was overwhelming. I'm in bed now, shivering under a blanket and trying to focus enough to get something - anything, really- done.

I'm reading some Christian Historicals (don't laugh!) that I got from the Hallmark panel thingus I'm on. I'm supposed to read them and give my opinions on this survey. Well. I will try my best to evaluate them for what they are and not from an atheist perspective. Though I'm reading the first one and Mr. Cowboy has prayed three times in the first eight pages. Granted, he's talked to his horse four times... but still. Praising God that he found the farmhouse was a little eye-roll, but saying God exceeded his expectations by making the farmhouse have a solid door for protection from the storm was a bit much. HOUSES HAVE DOORS. It's not God, it's architecture. Page 14: We have switched perspectives from the cowboy (and his horse) to the woman in the farmhouse. Who is also praying.

Today my brother Joe came down from Virgina - he's only staying through the weekend, but still good to get to see him for a while. Today we had italian buffet at Marcello's and played Scrabble. I also rode my bike with my other brother Ron.

This cold has me pretty run down - have way fallen behind on NaNo. I need to try and make up for lost time over the weekend especially.

I finished Ordinary Heroes - it was very good! Lots of surprises, all the way up to the end. Now I need to re-read The Secret Life of Bees for the next installment of the Gather Book Club.

I need to try and make tomorrow a writing day. I'm still ahead of the game, but the past few days have been non-productive and I don't want to fall behind on things. I am 29% done, so I can't give up now!

Some stressful things with the kids going on that I don't really want to get into right now because thinking about it will only make me upset again.

I also seem to have caught a cold from my brother, which is making me feel all run down.

Tomorrow though, I will find time to write! Los of writing goodness will occur. Or

14266 / 50000 words. 29% done!

I picked up a new game for my DS - Mystery Case Files: Millionheir . Only twenty bucks, not a bad deal. I've played and enjoyed the Mystery Case Files series on the PC, so I was looking forward to trying this one. It's pretty sweet. Makes use of a lot of capacities of the DS, and has some nice touches - like when you use the x-rayer to search for clues and you run it over a cat or dog or some such, you see their skeleton. It's a nice distraction for my stress.

I'm also reading a book called Ordinary Heroes by Scott Turow - about a son who looks into his father's WWII record and finds an amazing story. It's neat as it is told in both the present time from the son's perspective, and in the past when the father was young and in the war. What the geek in me really likes is that they even set a different typeface for the father's sections and the son's. Not glaringly obvious (my mother didn't notice when she read the book) but I noticed, and thought it a good technique.

charloft is going well, I think. Lots of people having lots of fun. I am answering a lot of the prompts for heil_hans my immortal ex-Nazi who is eating my brain at the moment, and so_necromantic my necromancer / Nano main character.

Went for my longest bike ride yet yesterday, with my brother Ron. My legs kind of hurt from it today though.

Last night we finally brought the houseplants inside - and just in time, too as it's raining like crazy today and we might even have snow flurries tomorrow. Yuck!

Aus got me some books in preparation for NaNo - the No Plot, No Problem book, the No Plot No Problem novel writing kit, and Self Editing for Fiction writers. Husband for the win! <3

Now I just need to make sure to keep my stress levels down, keep the kids from driving me crazy, and figure out the rest of the research I need to do before Nov 1st.

Thursday there's a NaNo get together in Hammonton that I might attend if I'm feeling together enough to be social with strangers.

So let's see.. in other news...

Bad things:
- still no word from the job Aus interviewed for - possibly another bit of false hope
- betta fish is sick , possibly just constipated, possibly dying
- lost a band lackey job
- no interview for column

Good things:
- went to the zoo Monday with mom and my brothers
- sold a couple of books this week
- finished book review for The Smart One
- finished Stouffers frozen dinner review
- wrote a poem/song thing (well, would be a song if I could write music)
- have two columns planned out


Still to do:
- Designated Daughter review
- read / review Dear Neighbor, Drop Dead
- write column


I have one more book to read after that too, but it hasn't arrived yet.

Things we need but can't afford right now:
- my back medicine (pain = bad)
- a new pair of shoes for our son Steve (he has holes in his soles)
- new filter for our water (we use a Brita water filter for the sink, 'cause the well water is kinda unhealthy unfiltered)
- battery recharger (we use rechargeable batteries because it's better for the environment and they're cheaper and our charger just up and died)

And of course, there are the constant demands of:
- gas
- food
- rent


Things you can do to help:
Buy a book from our used book store! We have 79 books for sale right now, and we're adding more amazing books all the time.

Hire us for band work! We do/ have done work for bands including Ozma, Rilo Kiley, Interpol, Terami Hirsch, The Elected, Jenny Lewis and the Watson Twins, Eben Brooks band, and Tommy Wallach. We work either on a monthly fee or contract for a specific job (ie: promote for the duration of a tour, create a newsletter, write a press release, make a graphic... etc). Our services include promotion, social networking services, graphics, newsletter/ bulletin and site content ghostwriting, press releases, and site creation/maintenance. Usually we work with musicians, but hey -if you have a book to promote, would like to grow your social network for a business, need a graphic - get in touch for a price quote.

Hire Aus for computer work! Aus can do PHP programing, set up or maintain a database or online store, set up a basic website, set up a mailing list, gallery, or so on. Contact us with what you are looking for and get a price quote.

Buy a micro fiction postcard. For your donation of five dollars or more, I will choose a random lovely postcard from my postcard collection and write you your very own micro story on the back. This story will be specifically written just for you - you can even tell me what topic or theme you'd like (no erotica or gore). Each postcard will be numbered - and if I ever make it to the big time someday, it might be a collectible you can ebay or cherish. Either way. Get in touch and let me know what you'd like.

Hire Aus for a full time job! If you live in the South Jersey area and have an open position , have an open position in your company, or know of an open position you can give us a lead on - this would be tremendously helpful. Aus has been applying all over the place - he's seeking a full time position in the computer field. He is a Microsoft certified database administrator and could use some related work experience - so it would be very helpful for him to get an entry level job with a good company. Benefits a plus, but at this point we'll take what we can get.

We will also take any freelance work that is available - we're both correspondents at Gather.com - Aus writes for Money, and I write for Music - though we've covered a wide variety of other topics including politics, news, book reviews, and product reviews in our regular articles.

Some as low as 75 cents!

Check out our Half.com store to see what books we have for sale. There's only a handful up there now, but we're going to be adding more as time goes on - we have hundreds of books to sell.

I recommend Master and Commander (it's a seafaring adventure, not anything kinky for you pervs out there ;) and the accompanying lexicon that tells you all you need to know about the series and the terminology.

We're also doing a video game trade thing on this site, so check that out too!

Whales and Dolphins 3-D at the Imax was really visually stunning. The effects were very good- you felt like you were right there. If I had to pay for it though, I would have been slightly peeved that it was only 45 minutes long. As it was, the only irritating part was the hippie save the whales message that they beat you over the head with about seventy times in the space of that 45 minutes. Now, before you all gasp in horror, let me state that I am very much in favor of sealife conservation. I love the whales and dolphins and manatees and want them all to swim around and be happy in nice clean environments free of predation. That being said.. I don't need to be told how awful it is that everything is going to die out every five minutes. I do not have a harpoon in my purse at the movie theater - I am not the evil problem causing the extinction of the whales - but the movie made me feel like I was.

There was even a song at the end about who is going to be hunted next, and how terrible it is that we came from the sea but we drive sea creatures to extinction and so on. I don't remember the words, but the gist was 'Humans suck - whales rock, get off your ass and conserve some you lazy person. Visit our website and donate money and you'll suck less." It did detract from the experience.


Things to do tomorrow:
finish press release writing
clean the fish tank
go to post office
do something about getting Aus's stuff in to Office Team

We started a Half.com store by the way - take a look at some of the book we have for sale! Buy some, we'll love you forever. We'll be adding more as time goes on.

We also joined this neat program - a video game exchange. You can exchange games you don't want any more for points which you can use to get games from people who have the games you want available. Check it out here!

Being friends with people is such an exhausting emotional involvement sometimes. So are about a hundred other things - man, I just feel exhausted by life sometimes.

In better news though, I am reading/reviewing a good history book for Gather; I am going to see Indiana Jones tomorrow and Whales and Dolphins 3-D at the Imax on Wednesday - both movie-type-events presents for my birthday. The other things I received are:

Wii Fit
Indiana Jones Monopoly
Indiana Jones playing cards
Indiana Jones novelizations of the first three movies
Wordjong DS game
Croswords DS game
New Jersey Poets book
About ten used books from the library booksale and Goodwill- including Al Capone Does My Shirts, a biography of Chang and Eng Bunker (the original Siamese twins), Ten Little Indians, House of Sand and Fog

So good birthday so far - and my actual birthday isn't even until Friday.


I need some good music for a rocking summer playlist I'm putting together - any suggestions?